Many onetime parents-come-grandparents are getting a new lease on life these days; not retired, but re-tyred, and fit for another one hundred thousand kilometres or so–not of the ‘grey nomad’ variety–more simply, fitted for service in the ‘proactive grandparent’ mould.

I had the distinct pleasure of being edified by the Growing Families Australia team of Bill and Joan Grosser recently. They lauded the role of the grandparent as being one of the most important life roles any person can play.

These are some of the things I recorded and have made further comment on:

How will our grandchildren remember us?

Grandchildren remember their last memories of their grandparents; at least the last few years. Given that information, what legacy are we leaving? What would we like our children and grandchildren to say about us?

Do grandparents have a divine commission?

Plainly, yes! Grandchildren, it is said tongue-in-cheek, are a reward for not killing or maiming our own children. Children ordinarily believe that grandparents are “the only adults with time.” Grandparents have the window of opportunity to input into their grandchildren’s lives; the chance to leave a positive legacy for the next generation. Older people are clearly important in the lives of young people.

It is important that grandparents can share their authentic and sincere faith with their grandchildren, to transmit the wisdom messages before their journey of life ends.

Is proactive grandparenting a fine and delicate balance?

Yes indeed. Genesis 2:24 (NRSV) says, “Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Parents of adult children still too often interfere in the marriages of their children.

Grandparents cannot interfere too much in the family dynamic they’re blessed to support. Likewise, they’re not to become disconnected. Getting the dichotomy right is important. Establishing and maintaining a positive and appropriate connection as a grandparent is possibly the most important goal.

Some really important tips for proactive grandparents!

1. Don’t give your opinion unless it’s asked for. Always be prepared to actively listen and give only enough advice that would be helpful and welcomed.

2. Make your grandchildren visit and interact with you out of devotion, not duty. Be a joy in their lives.

3. Be a model and build strong relationships by being other-centred (focus on the needs of others, not so much on your own).

4. Tell your grandchildren vivid, appropriate stories about your children (their parents) that will help them know their unique place in life, building a wonderful sense of family history. (Most grandchildren with strong relationships with their grandparents love family stories–a sort of family ‘oral tradition.’)

5. Christian grandparents are urged to make the Bible real, vibrant and relevant to their grandchildren. No ‘Bible-bashing,’ but allow discussions on character development and discipleship to permeate through the relationship.

6. Be able to say sorry whenever it’s required; don’t delay apology when it’s needed. We all get it wrong from time to time and there’s no shame in that.

7. Finally, as a proactive grandparent you can be an encourager, a family culture carrier, a listener, an example, a security presence, and an intercessor–thinking and praying your grandchildren through their childhoods and into adulthood and right through life.

Re-tyring has a totally new and fresh feel about it now, doesn’t it?

This article is dedicated to my mother and father, who are fine active examples and models of what proactive grandparenting is all about.

Copyright © 2009, S. J. Wickham. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.

Steve Wickham is a safety and health professional (BSc) and a qualified lay Christian minister (GradDipDiv). His passion in vocation is facilitation and coaching; encouraging people to soar to a higher value of their potential. Steve’s key passion is work / life balance and re-creating value for living, and an exploration of the person within us.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Steve_Wickham
http://EzineArticles.com/?Not-Retired-But-Re-Tyred-For-Grandparenting!&id=2102990

It can be tough on families when grandparents are separated by a great distance from their grandchildren. It is only natural to want to be close to those that you love. But being a long distance grandparent does not mean that you cannot be a fully involved one. There are plenty of great ways to maintain your connection with your grandchildren. Discover some of the ways you can make your family the priority that they are without ever having to feel guilty or distressed over the space between you. Space and time does not determine the quality of love and commitment that you have for one another.

The point of family relations is forming a special bond that will last a lifetime and cannot be touched by such things as distance. A committed long distance grandparent can be more deeply devoted than one that lives across the street if it is in their actions to do so. Nurturing the relationship that you have with your grandchildren is essential. It is the root of all that you share. Regardless of age, you can have that special bond with each of your grandchildren. Though it may take some dedication and work, it is all a matter of reaching out and making yourself available.

One of the best ways to maintain a healthy relationship with your family is to keep in touch. Call or email them on a regular basis to find out how they are doing. Set up a time to have a web chat where you can talk with the use of a web cam so it is just like having a visit in person. Being able to see one another makes it much more personal and young grandchildren will especially enjoy it. Make a point to do this regularly so that you each have something to look forward to.

Planning a future trip or visit to get together is always a lot of fun. Even if you can only do it once a year, it is something to be celebrated and made special. Write letters or email and have conversations about everything that you can do together. Family that does not get to see each other all that often will never run out of ideas or things to do. Get your grandchildren excited about that future visit by getting them to make a list of everything they want to do during your visit. It will get you both anticipating that special time.

It is important to make sure that children realize why you must live so far apart. It can be difficult to understand for those that are incredibly young. Have them send you pictures and drawings regularly so they know that you want to hear from them and look forward to all that they have to share with you. Being a dedicated grandparent is what matters most, more than any span of distance. There are plenty of resources that can help to make long distances easier to deal with. Take advantage of them so that you can focus on enjoying your family.

Find helpful and creative ideas for parents and grandparents while you shop our great selection of kids furniture (including our popular collection of toddler beds) and classic toys. Visit http://www.TheMagicalRockingHorse.com today!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Penelope_Regula
http://EzineArticles.com/?Grandparenting-Long-Distance&id=2446241

Raising a child is, of course, the responsibility of the parents; however, grandparents can play an important role in a child’s life. As a grandparent myself, I pray that I can have a meaningful and valuable impact on my grandchildren’s lives.

Some grandparents choose not to become involved with their grandchildren due to their busy schedules, or because they live far away, or because they really don’t wish to be bothered. Grandparents should be an essential part of a child’s life. Paul realized the influence that family members had on the young apostle Timothy when he wrote: For I am mindful of the sincere faith within you, which first dwelt in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am sure that it is in you as well (2 Timothy 1:5).

What a blessing it is to be involved in our grandson’s life. Both sets of grandparents get to spend a lot of time with Calvin, since we all live nearby. He is a joy at ten-months of age, and I am thankful that his parents “permit’ us to be regularly involved with him.

My paternal grandparents lived in the same small town in which I was raised. They were an integral part of my growing up years. Grandma was an excellent cook and baker and, after school, I would stop in and taste whatever had just come out of the oven. She knew how much I loved cookie dough and always saved a pinch or two for me. Whenever I smell warm fresh baked bread, I think of my grandmother.

Just the thought of a slice of her bread spread with real butter makes my mouth water. Then there were her cinnamon rolls that I have tried to duplicate but don’t come close to her perfection. My cousins and I took turns staying at my grandparents’ summer cottage. What a treat it was to wade in the creek out back and attempt to catch crawdads in an old can, or play under the giant weeping willow tree in the front yard, or make a fort in the woods out of fallen tree branches, or catch fireflies in jars at night. We looked forward to dinner time when our grandfather would join us and make us giggle with his humor. These were such simple activities but ones that made wonderful, lasting memories.

Being a grandparent doesn’t require spending much money. All it really requires is a little time and the desire to develop a warm and loving relationship with grandchildren. I didn’t get to see my mother’s parents very often for they lived far away, but I have a lasting memory of my Grandmother Partridge that made quite an impact on my life until this day. She always traveled to see us with her flannel board. I learned a great deal about the Bible as I sat at her feet listening to her marvelous voice recount the stories of the Old and New Testament.

As parents, I hope you encourage the grandparents of your children to develop a close relationship with them. Their lives will be richer and fuller, and the positive impact on their lives cannot be measured.

By Carol DeMar. Visit her website at:

http://www.familyraising.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Carol_DeMar
http://EzineArticles.com/?Grandparenting-Your-Grandchildren&id=2620238